The most Simple of Steps to getting a Boyfriend

So, there's this guy.
His name is Brennan.
He's adorable.

And, even better, he's My Boyfriend!
I know what you're thinking. You're trying to figure out how I, Sierra Noel Osmun, got a boyfriend. And an adorable one at that.

Let me tell you how I did it in the most simple of steps.


-Step One.-
Shower. This step is vital to the boyfriend-getting. It makes you smell bearable (depending on what you do in the shower [i.e. use soap] makes the smell change). And, when you smell bearable, people can talk to you, because they can't smell anything nauseating radiating off of your body.

-Step One and a Half.-
Dry off. You'd think this was obvious. But it is not so.

-Step Two.-
Try and not be awkward. But then be as awkward as you feel. Because it's always best to be yourself and not someone less awkward that you are.

-Step Three.-
Go outside. Okay, I know that this is a hard one, but you just gotta do it! You can wean yourself to it and go out a little more every day, or just do it fast like a bandaid.

-Step Four.-
Say hello to someone of the opposite gender. Or the same gender. I don't judge. But either way, you gotta talk to someone in order for him to become your boyfriend.

**Don't forget to keep showering!

-Step Five.-
Make sure he likes Netflix. Or Flamin' Hot Cheetos. Or something that you like. Cause yeah, oposites attract. But there's gotta be somethin'.

Now, it is important that you do not skip any of these steps.
If you don't skip any of these steps, you will get a relationship like this::


And who doesn't want that?