Books

So, I'm officially in debt for the first time in my life. It feels horrible. I'm never going to do this ever again. I just HATE textbooks. I only bought five! What the piss. I'm so poor it's not even funny.

I'm currently watching Reba. And it's great. I mean, I'm supposed to be doing my math homework, but..
Yolo.

Me and Jess Jess are Sick.

Love, me

Love is a hard thing to do. I don't just mean love. I mean trusting, falling, completely engulfed, your heart in their hands, know all your weaknesses, love.

Love is also a pretty strange thing.

You give your whole being to someone else. Put the power of destroying your life, in their hands. My question is, is it true that it is better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all? Because sometimes, I feel the opposite is truer than true. That it's better to just take it all back and forget it all happened, because you hurt and hurting sucks.

But I'm getting off topic. What I'm trying to say here is, love is hard.

But you know what's even harder? Loving yourself.

I'm going to teach you how, though. In 3 easy steps.

1. Tell yourself you are awesome and that you love you for you and you don't care what others think.

No, seriously. Do it every morning in the mirror while you look at yourself. Because, the first few times, it's gonna be pretty awkward, and even hard to do. But keep doing it. Never stop. Tell yourself that you are strong, that you are amazing, that you make mistakes and that's okay, because everyone makes mistakes.

2. Don't judge, that includes yourself.

Judging is just something we as humans do. We judge individuals, we judge groups, and we judge ourselves. Straight up, getting judged sucks, and we wish it wasn't a thing. But it is. And we have to deal with that, because we can't change what others do or think or say. But you know what we can change? What we do or think or say. And we can make us, one less person to judge us.

3. Stop criticizing yourself and stop comparing yourself to others.

Yeah, sure, you done messed up. You did something wrong. But do you wanna know a secret? Everyone on this earth has done somethings wrong. It's a thing that happens. And you know what? You are unique. That means there is no one else that is exactly like you. Your situation is unique, your body is unique, your home life is unique, everything about you is unique. So how could you even start to compare yourself to others? Because, when you do start to compare yourself to others, you compare your worst traits to their best.

Now, I haven't quite mastered these three steps, and I haven't quite mastered loving myself. But I'm on my way there. And you will be too, soon. And yeah, it's gonna totally suck sometimes. But when it starts to suck, look at pictures of babies and puppies and kittens, then you'll feel better.

Picture Credit:: Jerrica Ciel Osmun Pond

the Sickness problem

I'm sick. So that's cool.

Day before school starts, I get sick. Awesome. I love life. But really, life is pretty great other than the sickness problem.

Classes start tomorrow, and I have a pretty rad schedule. I have two jobs so I'm gettin' paypur. And my apartment is awesome and full of awesome people. So I guess you could say life is going pretty well. Except for some days it's bad, so that's a thing.

I've been working all day all week, so that's why I haven't been able to blog too much lately. It pretty much murdered my feet and knees, but that's okay. Cause I got paypur.

And because classes start tomorrow, I am going to be busy a lot more, so I won't be able to blog as much. But, I mean, who knows, because I might just have nothing to do all day, so I'll blog all day every day.

So that might be a thing.

This is Happening.

Sometimes, I miss my best friends. The old ones that I don't talk to anymore. Or, more like, the ones that don't talk to me anymore.
You see, there are two people that, I thought, were my whole life.
Those of you who have read my blog before, probably know who I'm talking about. And, I know, I told you I wasn't going to write about them anymore (more him than the other). But I'm going to. Because I'm weakling. Also, yolo.

For those of you who don't know who I'm talking about, don't worry about it. Because there's no point in naming names of those who are in my past.

Him number one. Was my first real boyfriend. My first real kiss. And, my first real best friend. But are they really a best friend if they leave you? I don't know, that's for you to decide. And, haha, the funny thing is, I think about him.. Pretty much every day. And you know what? I absolutely hate it. Because he probably thinks of me a total of zero times a day. I seriously doubt he even thinks of me on my birthday.

Him number two. Haha, it's funny, this was recent. He told me his girlfriend didn't want him to talk to anyone who was involved in his past, whatever that means. And one, I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who made me stop talking to my friends, and two, maybe it wasn't his girlfriend at all maybe that was his excuse so he didn't have to talk to me anymore.

I should just forget about both of them. They are not worth my time. So why do I keep thinking about them? Why do I keep blogging about them? Why do I keep talking about them?

I don't know. But I hate it.

(almost)allthewaymovedin

so... Today was long.
that's all I wanna say about it.


I found a new song.

Wasn't that great?

Moving part II

not excited not excited not excited

I just keep repeating this. Because, you know, I'm not excited.
Basically, I feel like this:

And then, when I remember that I have to move again.. I'm all



and then